Captain Obvious

I call my mom Captain Obvious. It’s a term of endearment really. It’s because of a unique habit she has. I also believe that this habit is directly responsible for my high level of sarcasm. Allow me to demonstrate:

I walk into the house at about 10pm after a night out, she’s sitting in front of the TV with my dad and says “Are you home?” and no, I haven’t altered the meaning in the translation from Greek. It’s exactly that question. I think it’s a Greek thing…this incessant rhetorical questioning. As far as I can tell, it’s just a way to start a conversation, or, if said with a certain tone, to instill guilt (another Greek specialty, but that’s another story). So this is where my sarcasm comes from:

Mom: Are you home?

Me: No Ma, I’m still out having drinks…cheers!

I walk out of the bathroom wearing a fuzzy robe with a towel wrapped around my wet hair and dripping slightly.

Mom: Did you take a shower?

Me: No, this is a new look I’m trying out.

Or, aside from the questioning, there’s also pointing things out…like when I’m in the shower and my phone starts to ring. The ringing is followed by banging on the bathroom door.

Mom: Your phone is ringing!!

Me: What do you want me to do?! Come out wet and naked and answer it!!

Mom: But it won’t stop ringing!!

Fortunately I now find it funny. And I’m trying to curb the sarcasm. And much to my horror, it seems I’m starting to do it too. Another fine family tradition passed on to the new generation.