So, it’s about 5am, I’m on a sleek black yacht, docked at a Greek island with a modern-day Onassis…who we’re calling ‘Bob’. Bob, who is also a filmmaker, wants to show me some of his projects, but the DVD player is in his bedroom. Of course.
I continue to drown out the little alarm bells in my head, calling myself paranoid and presumptuous. What on earth would a man like this want with little ole me? Upon entering his room, I got my answer. There was no normal lighting, just rope lights lining the walls and the bed. “My friends call this the Vegas Room” says Bob. I smile stiffly and start berating myself for being so stupid. I allow the alarm bells to wail away, late as they may be.
He lounges back on his bed and grabs the remote. He puts the TV on so we can watch his show. I sit bolt upright on the very edge of the bed and run through my options. I should point out though, that while this was an idiotic situation, it was at no point dangerous; the man was horny but harmless. This still left me with a problem though. So my stream of thought went something like this:
“It’s 5 o’clock in the morning. I’m on some Godforsaken island in the middle of the Aegean. I know absolutely no-one but him and the only way off the island is via ferry boat which comes every couple of days. Perfect. I don’t want to do anything with him…but I don’t want to upset him either, and he probably thinks this is why I came.”
So I went with my greatest strength:
“I’ll just play dumb.”
Suddenly he was nestled up beside me, the TV was off and his hand was sliding up my thigh. He might as well have been pushing an ejection seat button because I jumped up off that bed so fast, that his hand was still mid stroke.
“Oh look at the time!” I yawned and stretched my arms. “Off to bed! See you in the morning!” and I spun around bolted into my room, locking myself in with everything but a chest of drawers.
This was possibly my first lesson in the wicked ways of the male species. It was also my first lesson on the power of the female species - what we have obviously surpasses all money and power as history and my little boat incident have proven.
I spent the next two days artfully avoiding him in what he must have thought was the world’s most prolonged tease. I came to realize that everyone on the island must have thought I was the weekend floozy and to this day when I meet people from that film set, they refer to me as ‘Bob’s guest’ with a smile and a wink.
Thankfully, nothing happened, I wrote my story and never got an invite to a yacht again!
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